by
Glitter

I got pregnant at a young age, I won't even front. When I got pregnant I was only seventeen, in the beginning of my last year of high school, head deep into my art classes working on my portfolio for all the art schools I wanted to apply to. My boyfriend, Andre, a senior too, was working on his football scholarship and working hard in his architectural classes. We had our shit planned. We knew exactly what steps we were taking; we even applied to schools in the same states so we wouldn't be apart from each other. Life seemed perfect.

Then I got pregnant. Can I tell you how hell broke loose? My father was threatening murder, my mom kept crying all the time, and Andre just seemed to be in shock. We had been together for two years, and had mentioned getting married and having kids down the line, but this was all happening too fast. He mentioned abortion, but I shut him up on that right away. I refused to even think that route, so he didn't mention it again. I wasn't stupid, I knew this was going to make our plans a little difficult, but I didn't think it was going to really hurt anything as long as we kept focused.

I couldn't have been more wrong. About two months after we found out I was pregnant, Andre started acting funny. Usually, he was a very attentive boyfriend, always meeting up with me after school if he didn't have practice or something, and walking me home, calling me every single day just to say hi or to hear my voice he'd say. Soon there would be days where I wouldn't see him, and lately when I called him, he'd be too busy too talk, or was on his way out and say he'd call me back, but I wouldn't hear from him. I was getting a serious brush-off and I knew it.

I think I was ending my fourth month, and just really starting to show when I finally caught up with him outside of his math class. I hadn't seen him for an entire week, and I wanted to know what was up.

"I've just been busy, that's all." He said, hardly looking at me. "You know how it is, Boo. I'm working on my portfolio and that scholarship."

"Like I'm not?" I asked. "What's going on, Andre? I've hardly seen you and you missed the doctor's appointment we had."

"I told you, Maya, I've just been busy."

What do you do when you know your man's been playing you? Most girls would lose their cool and cuss him out right then and there. But I was smarter than that. I had my pride.

I just nodded and took a step back. "Listen, if you're getting to be too busy for me and your child on purpose, then just be a man and let me know up front. I don't have time to play games, Andre."

And of course, that set him off. "What do you mean? You act like I'm bailing on you or somethin'!"

No matter what he does, just stay calm. "I'm just telling you what it looks like, Andre, that's all. I'm not mad, I just want to know what the deal is so I can plan." I was lying my ass off. I was already jumping on him and scratching his eyes out in my mind. Seeing the look of fear on his face was just too much of a teaser in my imagination, so I had to take a step back before it became a reality. Plus I couldn't play games like that anymore; I had my baby to consider.

"Listen, can we talk about this later? I'm late for class." He said.

There was my answer. "Sure," I said sweetly. Lord, nigga, you have no idea how I'm gonna hurt you once this baby is born. "Give me a call when you get a chance, ok?" Then I smiled and walked away, trying to keep the tears that were threatening to fall from showing.

"Yo, Maya!"

Female voice. I turned to see Coco Anderson running up to me. I vaguely knew her, she ran with a different crew, living a few neighbourhoods away from me. We shared a few classes last year and she was in one of my art classes this year. I knew she wanted to be a fashion designer, like me, and from the sketches I saw, she had huge talent.

My fashion illustration class was next, and I shared that with her, so I slowed down so she could catch up to me.

"What's up?" I asked, trying to remain calm.

Coco glanced back at Andre, who was already disappearing around a corner. "Didn't meant to eavesdrop, but he was getting kinda loud and I couldn't help it. Are you ok?"

"Yeah, I'm fine." I said, now more upset because someone had heard what was going on with us. I was putting up a good front for my family, saying that Andre and I talked all the time. And to my friends I said that I saw him in the evenings a lot. I didn't want people to know what was up. I valued my privacy.

She was now looking at my stomach. "I didn't even know what was up, girl. How far along are you?"

"Almost five months." I said. "But I'm keeping it on the DL, ok?"

She nodded. "No problem. Hey, if you need anything, just let me know, OK?"

"Like what?" I asked. I know it sounded rude, but I hardly knew her and she was offering help.

She shrugged. "Just anything, that's all." We had reached our classroom and she opened the door and held it for me. "Just keep that in mind, that's all."

I had to smile. It was the nicest thing I had heard all day. "Thanks."

For the entire class, I found myself watching her every now and then. She was seriously into her art, never raising her head or talking to anyone else. Once she had laid out her supplies and sat on that stool, she never moved or stopped sketching. I wasn't really sure what to make of her. I didn't really know that much about her. Whenever I saw her out of school, she was always surrounded by a group of guys or some female friends that looked just like her. What do I mean? She was one of those girls who you never saw in a dress. And I mean never. Always in baggy jeans, Tims or sneakers, her hair always in cornrows, no make-up or big jewelry; none of that stuff like me or my friends were into. She was like one of the guys, to be honest. I didn't think nothing of it, there were a lot of tomboys in my school, so it was no biggie. I saw her playing football one time in the park behind the school, and from what I knew about football, by watching our school team play, she was pretty good. And I heard that she played basketball too.

When the bell rang, I looked down at my desk, and I had hardly sketched at all. I chastised myself for being so neglectful and cleared my stuff away and left class.

At the end of the day, I was at my locker, loading up my backpack, and fighting every single urge to just lie on the floor and take a nap. I was that tired. I was one of the lucky ones, not really having a problem with morning sickness, but I wanted to sleep all the time though. And I lived about seven blocks away from school, so I just wanted to get there quickly and get some sleep.

"Feeling any better?"

I turned and there she was again, with a big smile on her face, along with a look of concern.

"Yes, just tired, that's all." I said, closing my locker. I was about to swing my bag over my shoulder, when she took the strap from me, and swung the bag over hers, along with her own backpack.

"Yeah, when my cousin was pregnant she slept all the damn time." She chuckled. "You need a ride home?"

"Nah, I'll be alright." I said, and then a yawn escaped me.

She laughed. "Yeah, whatever, come on, I'm driving you home."

I honestly didn't have the energy to say no, so I just followed her. As we walked, she asked other baby things, making sure to not mention Andre's name, and I appreciated it. It was the kind of conversation I had pictured Andre and I having. She asked about where I was planning on living, if I had checked out schools that allowed living quarters for single mothers, baby names, how my sonograms went, etc. And for the first time, I was actually animated about the baby. My father was still upset about the whole thing, but my mother was coming around, trying to talk him into turning the spare room we had into a nursery. That started Coco on decorating the nursery and she would paint a mural on one wall like she had done for her cousin, if I would let her. I couldn't help but smile at her generosity.

The drive home was pleasant, Coco still asking me questions about my future plans and stuff, getting me to talk about things I really hadn't thought about. I was so into the technicalities of this pregnancy; making sure that financially I could handle it while still going to school, handling my part-time job, and all that jazz, I really hadn't taken the time to really try to enjoy it.

"You know that being pregnant this young is not the best thing, but you really should find some kind of positive side it if you're going to make it work." She said suddenly.

"Why do you say that?" I asked.

"Because you haven't thought none of the fun shit out. At all." She replied, turning the car onto my street. "Just because your man ain't doing his shit to help you relax, doesn't mean you can't think of the good things too, you know. You don't gotta be superwoman."

Who was this girl anyway? Just meeting her really for the first time today and already she was telling me what I should do. But when I thought about it, I knew she was right. And I was silent for the remainder of the drive to my house. As soon as we arrived, Coco got out of the car and walked around the front to open my door before I even had a chance, and she helped me out of the car, taking my backpack from me. She walked me to the door, and waited till I unlocked it.

"Aight, I'll see you tomorrow then." She smiled and turned to walk down the steps then she stopped and looked at me. "You need a ride tomorrow morning?"

I shook my head. "No, I'll be alright, but thank you."

"You sure?" She asked. "It's on my way. You know what, I'm just gonna be here at 7:45, ok?" Then she winked and walked to her car, leaving me standing there with my mouth hanging open.

And that's how our friendship started. Coco just seemed to always be there. In the mornings, she'd be at my door ringing the bell at 7:45am sharp, then after school, she'd be at my locker ready to drive me home. She was a complete godsend. My friends were getting annoyed with my tiredness and unwillingness to hang out all the time. I was always a pretty serious person, had my head in the books, keeping to my goals, and I was spending what energy I had left on my schoolwork. I was beginning to feel a bit lonely, but now with Coco in the picture, that loneliness slipped away. She'd drive me home and we'd spend the evenings at my house, working on school stuff and our artwork. Sometimes, if I had the energy, we'd go to her house to hang out. I met her mother, Maria, who was extremely sweet, and she'd be spoiling me like crazy, making all these delicious meals for me, telling me I needed to fatten up all the time, which was true, since my doctor told me the same thing.

About three weeks after we first met, Coco had a surprise for me. As usual, we were walking to her car after school, and when she opened the door, there was a huge basket in the passenger seat, filled with stuffed toys, baby accessories, bottles, and some baby clothes.

"Surprise." She said leaning against the car.

My hormones kicked in right there and I burst into tears.

Her smile fell and she immediately put her arms around me. "Yo, what's wrong, Maya?"

I shook my head, "Nothing, nothing. It's just my hormones." I fished a tissue out of my pocket, wiping my nose. "It's so beautiful, Coco, thank you."

Here came that smile I was so used to. "Aight, cool. Come on, I got another surprise for you."

"You don't have to..."

"I don't wanna hear it, come on." She closed my door after I got into the car and walked around to her side. "Listen, you have to wear this." She was holding up a blindfold.

"Hell no."

"Come on, Maya, just do this for me, please?" She was smiling, giving me a fake pout.

I laughed, snatching the blindfold from her. "Ok, ok, you win."

As soon as I put it on, she put the car in motion. We were driving for about twenty minutes, Coco talking the entire time, telling me about her day. For once I didn't feel tired, so I just lay my head back and listened to her soothing voice. I never really paid attention to her voice before. It was soft, really husky, with a touch of a southern accent-her family was originally from Mississippi-and thinking of it made me smile.

When the car finally stopped, Coco got out of the car. I heard mine open, and she took my hand. "Come on, Miss Thang."

"Where are we?" I asked.

"You'll find out soon enough, watch your legs." She closed the door and was now guiding me somewhere. Usually I wasn't in the mood for things like this, but for some reason, I trusted her enough to just let her take my arm and I followed her. I could tell that we were somewhere public from hearing all the noises and people talking. Soon we were in a quieter place, and I felt plush carpet under my feet. There, Coco stopped me.

"Ready?" She asked.

"Yes, please." I said, my anticipation building. Where the hell was I?

Coco slid the blindfold off and the first thing I saw was pink. I looked around.

"A maternity store?" I asked.

She smiled. "Yeah. I mean, you need some new clothes, and I know you're busy and all and most likely you'll forget..."

I was fighting the urge to cry, and not because of my hormones either. Earlier that week I had been noticing that my clothes were way too tight. I was resorting to fastening my jeans underneath my tummy just so I could wear them. But funds were tight, and I couldn't afford new clothes. And I didn't know how to tell her that.

"Um, listen," I began trying not to show my embarrassment, "Right now isn't a good time..."

"Why not?" She asked, steering me towards a rack of dresses. "I was in here the other day and I saw this dress and it looked like it would look cool on you. And I knew you'd like it, since it's your colour and all." She pulled out a purple dress with an empire waist that looked like it would fall to my knees. Purple was my favourite colour.

"And I saw this," She moved a few dresses down and pulled out a light blue floral dress in a similar style, "I know it's getting cold, but I thought you'd look great in this one."

"Coco..."

"But I was thinking though. I saw these jeans, and these overalls are cool too, and there's this jacket they have on the other side that looks like it'll be warm enough for the winter..."

"Coco..."

"And check this out. They got this belt that you can wear when your stomach gets bigger, right? It's this wide elastic band really, that you wear under your tummy and it'll help your back..."

"Coco!"

She stopped and looked at me confused. "Yo, what's wrong?" She saw the look on my face, and immediately concern covered hers. "Are you ok? I thought you'd like this."

"I do, don't get me wrong." I said. "It's just that...well...I don't have..."

"I was hoping you'd like this, cuz I wanted to help you out a bit, know what I mean? I know you were probably gonna go shopping for some clothes soon, but I know that you need to save your money for more important things. So I hope you didn't think I'm gonna let you pay for any of this." She said suddenly, and we both knew that I had. "So quit your worrying and try these on."

"Coco..."

"And I don't want to hear your mouth, ok? Here," She handed me some garments, "just go into the fitting room and tell me what you think, I'll be out here. Go!" She added when I didn't move.

I couldn't help the smile that tugged at my lips and I rushed into the fitting rooms. Can I just tell you what happened? We spent about an hour in that store alone, then she took me to a shoe store to get me some flat dressy shoes and some better sneakers, then it was to the children's store where we browsed some infant clothes, but I wouldn't allow her to get anything there and she finally gave in. In the back of my mind I was trying to figure out how I was going to pay her back for all of it. In my I head, I calculated that she had spent at least two hundred dollars on things I was only going to be wearing for about four months.

By the time we got to my house, I had bags, upon bags of things to drag in. Coco only let me carry a few of the light bags, while she somewhat effortlessly carried in the rest. The look on my parents' faces when we walked in was priceless.

"Andre sent you shopping?" My mother asked.

I was about to agree automatically, but I looked at Coco who didn't even look at me. "No, Coco took me shopping." I said.

I could see the confusion on their faces, but I didn't want to talk about it and I just went straight to my room. To be honest, I didn't even want to talk about Andre at all. I hadn't talked to him since that day I caught up with him, and I didn't want to. He wasn't making any effort at all, and I took it as we were over and he wanted nothing to do with me. I wasn't giving myself any chance to think about it because it only made me upset and that wasn't good for the baby, so I pushed him and any thoughts of him out of my mind. But seeing that look on their faces was bringing everything to the surface and I knew I was about to lose it.

Coco saw the look on my face, and she just put the bags down. "Listen, you're tired, I had you out for a minute, so just get some rest, ok? I'm gonna head out."

I just nodded. "Thank you for today."

She shrugged. "It was nothing, don't sweat it. I'll see you tomorrow bright and early, Miss Thang."

I just smiled, trying to hold the tears back.

Coco turned to walk out the door, but instead she just closed it and turned to look at me. She looked at me for a moment, then just opened her arms.

I fell into them immediately and just let it all out. She maneuvered us to the bed, and I just lay my head on her shoulder and just cried and cried. Everything that I had been holding in for the past few months just came out. And it came out in currents. I must have been literally bawling, because there was a knock on my door and my mother walked in. She stopped short when she saw us, then she focused on me.

"Honey, what's wrong?"

I pulled away from Coco, wiping my face with my sleeve. "Just hormones, that's all."

She didn't look like she bought it, but she smiled faintly. "I was crying every hour when I was pregnant with you." She said softly. Then as if something clicked in her head, she became serious again. "Well, we're about to have dinner, Ok? Coco, you're welcome to stay."

"Thank you, Ma'am, but my mother's expecting me for dinner tonight."

My mother nodded. "Ok. Well, dinner is going to be ready in ten minutes." Then she left the room, closing the door behind her.

"I'm gonna get going." Coco said.

"Ok." I agreed.

But for some reason we just sat there staring at each other. For some reason it was like I was looking at her for the first time. I never really noticed how she looked before. Coco was just like her name. Her skin was the colour of milk chocolate, and she had these really light, almond shaped hazel eyes with flecks of green. I never noticed that she had a rounded nose that turned up a bit. And how she had these full lips. And I was seriously staring at her lips for a moment, when I noticed they were coming towards me.

I looked up just as she closed her eyes and our lips met. I held still for a moment, feeling her soft lips against mine, before reality set in on what was going on.

I pulled back and shot to my feet. "Coco..."

"I'm sorry." She said quickly. "Listen, I didn't mean for that to happen." She got to her feet. "I'm just gonna go, ok?" And then she was gone. Leaving me in a state of shock and confusion.

I wasn't really sure what to do, but I know what had happened.

I kissed a girl.

*** *** *** ***

I had assumed that after what had happened the night before, Coco was definitely going to avoid me. But as I was finishing getting dressed, the doorbell rang on time, and I heard my mother greet her. As I came down the stairs, I realized I was definitely looking at her in a different way. She was wearing a pair of black Wu-Tang jeans, a light blue tank, with a black button-down shirt hung open, and her black Tims, with a light blue bandana wrapped around her head in a band. And as I looked at her, I swear I felt my nipples start to harden.

And as I looked at her, I noticed that she was looking at me. I was wearing the purple dress she had gotten me the day before with my favourite sandals. I had pulled my short hair back with a headband, and wore light make-up. Ever since I found out I was pregnant I hadn't been in the mood to really dress up, let alone wear make-up. But for some reason I was in the mood to. And the way that Coco was looking at me, made me glad that I had.

When I finally stood before her, I just smiled. "What's wrong?"

"N-n-nothing." She said. "You eat breakfast already?"

Always thoughtful. "No, not yet. I wasn't in the mood."

"Whatever. We'll pick something up on the way. You ready?"

"Yep."

I don't know. I can't really explain it. But I wasn't looking at her in the same way. It was as if she was a completely new person. I was conscious of how she looked, the way she smelled, how she moved. Little things she always did before, I totally took notice of now. Like how she held her hand at the small of my back when we walked, or how she always opened the car door for me, how she doted on me. I hadn't really noticed it before because I thought she was just fawning over me because I was pregnant. But it wasn't just that...this was her, how she was normally.

We stopped through the McDonalds's drive-thru on the way to school for a quick breakfast, and as we waited, she finally spoke.

"About last night..."

"It was ok." I interrupted her. "Don't sweat it, ok?"

She just looked at me, then nodded. "Ok."

It was sort of an acceptance. It wasn't the right place or time to talk about it, but I wanted to let her know that it was fine with me. And in truth...it really was.

School, wonderful school. The first day in months that I was in a good mood. I actually had a smile on my face throughout the day. With what I was wearing, I couldn't really hide my stomach, so when people asked, I answered honestly. I could see looks of shock, disappointment, and concern, but I played it off well, letting everyone know that I had everything under control, and I really did feel that. I was feeling so good all day. But by the end of the day, I was exhausted, my back hurt, my feet hurt, and I was seriously hating these stank-ass sandals, and all I wanted to do was sleep.

"Maya..." the look of worry on Coco's face, when she finally met me at my locker, told me how I looked. "What happened?"

"I don't feel good." I simply said. "I just want to sleep."

"Come on." She said, taking my bag. As soon as I sat in the car, I let my head fall back against the headrest, and closed my eyes. I seriously must have fallen asleep, cuz when I opened my eyes, we were in front of Coco's building, and she was opening my door. I let her take my arm and help me up the stairs to her apartment and as soon as I hit her room I lay down and fell asleep.

When I opened my eyes, she was sitting at the foot of the bed, playing her Playstation, wearing just her tank and boxers.

Boxers, I thought with a small smile.

I moved, and she dropped the controller, rushing to my side. "Damn, you were asleep for a minute. You ok?"

"Yeah." I said yawning, hoping I didn't have dragon breath. "What time is it?"

"It's almost eleven o'clock."

"What?"

"Don't worry, I called your house and told your mother. She said to let you stay here and sleep. I'll bring you to your house early tomorrow so you can change and stuff." She still looked concerned. "Are you hungry?"

Food. Suddenly I was very hungry. "Oh my god, yes."

She broke into a smile. "Aight, I'll be back."

I was hungry. Very hungry. Her mother had made fried chicken and French fries, and I sent Coco back for two more plates, and each time she laughed. When my stomach was finally settled, I lay back on the bed, with a contented smile.

"My moms is gonna be happy when she hears about this." She said laughing.

"I bet." I agreed.

"You tired?" She asked.

"Nah, not for a little while." I then realized I was still dressed. "Do you have something I can sleep in?"

She handed me an oversized t-shirt. I sat up with the shirt and was about to get to my feet, when she stopped me.

"Just chill...relax." She knelt before me, taking my leg in her hands, and winked at me. I was conscious of how soft her hands felt on my skin. How her fingers seemed to graze my skin, making it kind of hot. I watched as she unlaced the ties on my sandals and slowly slid each off. Then she took each foot in her hand and gently massaged them, making me groan aloud, and I could feel myself blush.

"Don't be embarrassed." She said softly.

"My feet were seriously hurtin'." I said.

"Kinda figured." She replied. "Just relax."

So I did. I closed my eyes and leaned back on my hands while I let her fingers work their magic. I couldn't remember the last time I had ever had a massage, and now here I was feeling the most amazing feeling in the world. (When you're pregnant, a massage is heaven on earth.) And believe me when I say her fingers were magical. As they touched a new part of skin, whatever tension I had just seemed to melt away as they moved on. I felt her hands slowly moving up my calves, past my knees (I broke into a fit of giggles as she touched them), and to my thighs. She stopped suddenly and my eyes flew open.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Trying to figure out how to get your dress off without you moving." She said.

I laughed as I let her help me to my feet. She raised my hands and helped slide the dress up and over my head. I was now in my bra and panties, and was suddenly conscious of my body. Ever since I got pregnant, no one had seen my body, and nobody saw the stretch marks, my swollen stomach, and my now oversized breasts. As soon as the dress came off, my arms immediately covered my exposed flesh.

She sat me down on the bed and sat behind me. I soon forgot about my body once her hands began their magic on my shoulders and back. Good God, this woman had some amazing hands. They were kneading my flesh everywhere, relaxing me completely. I was slightly aware of her unhooking my bra, and sliding it off. All I cared about was how amazing her hands felt on my skin. I was aware that no longer was I just feeling relaxed, but I was starting to feel aroused as well. I could feel my already sensitive nipples hardening. As her hands moved up to the back of my neck, I literally sighed. When they moved to my shoulders, then met in the centre of my back, softly going down my spine, I trembled and let out a soft moan.

Coco slipped her hands around my waist and pulled me back so I was lying against her. I felt her lips against my ear, her voice soft and silky, "Maya, I want you."

I wasn't sure what to say really, so I just nodded. Her hand came up under my chin and turned my head to the side and our lips met. My hand reached up and held the back of her head, pulling her face closer to mine. Her hands found my breasts, cupping them, and I just groaned as her fingers were teasing my nipples, tugging on them gently. I was surprised by how comfortable I felt, letting her lie me down on my back before she slipped off her clothes. I was covering my breasts and stomach with my arms, and she just smiled.

"What are you hiding?" She asked softly.

I just shrugged.

She took my arms and lay them down by my sides. "You're still beautiful, Maya. Even more so."

"I don't feel really beautiful right now." I said honestly.

Coco lay beside me on the bed, and let her hand fall between my breasts, tracing small circles on my skin. "Everything about you is beautiful, Maya. You just don't realize it. Your smile, your laugh, the way you look when you're so into your work, the way your hair falls in your face sometimes." Her fingers were now tracing my nipples. "Your eyes..." She leaned forward and kissed them, "Your lips..." She slid her tongue across my lips, then dipped it in, and I immediately sucked it in deep, making her groan.

Her fingers gently pinched my nipples then trailed down to my tummy. I immediately tensed up, but didn't stop. In fact, she gently nibbled on my lips, then moved her head down and planted a kiss on my swollen belly, before letting her tongue snake out and lick the same spot. She looked up and our eyes met. She winked at me, and all I could do was smile. She began planting kisses all over my tummy, reaching up to place a finger on my lips, which I sucked into my mouth and tickled with my tongue. Her kisses kept moving lower and lower, till they reached my panty line, and I held my breath.

Coco pulled her hand away from me, and hooked her fingers into my waistband and pulled on my panties. I lifted my hips, as she slid them down my legs and tossed them aside. She smiled at me, as she parted my legs, and lay between them. Part of me wanted to close my eyes, but the other part was curious.

And I didn't have to wait for long. I watched her head lower between my thighs, and I felt her soft, wet tongue connect with my lips and I gasped. I couldn't believe this was happening, but I felt my body begin to respond to her skilled mouth. She slid her hands underneath my ass, pulling my crotch closer to her hungry mouth, and I instinctively lifted my legs higher, giving her a better access to what she wanted so much. She groaned, gripping me harder, digging her nails into my skin, and I just closed my eyes, reveling in the best feeling I ever felt in my life. And believe it or not, she even made it feel better. I felt her slide a finger inside of me, and I tensed at first, my first thought was the baby, but she lifted her head.

"Just relax, Ok? I promise, I'm not gonna hurt you." She gave my inner thigh a gentle kiss and I relaxed. Soon the finger inside of me began to feel good, as she began sliding it in and out. And my hips began rocking back and forth meeting her thrusts. I felt her tongue flick across my clit I cried out. She did it again, this time more slowly, then sucked it into her mouth, and she started to move her head back and forth as she sucked on it, as she slid another finger inside of me, and I felt my legs beginning to tremble.

Oh, God, never ever make her stop, I thought. I was now moaning, because I could feel my orgasm start its climb. My hands shot out to hold her head close to my crotch, as I bucked my hips against her lips.

"Oh, my God, Coco!" I cried out, feeling it start.

She pulled her mouth away quickly, still pumping me with her hand, as she climbed up to be beside me. She kissed my lips gently, giving me a taste of my own juices.

"Cum for me." She said softly, pumping her hand even faster. She slid her free arm under my head, and held me close as she kissed my face and lips, whispering that I was beautiful and I looked so good to her.

"I'm gonna cum..." I said suddenly.

"Go ahead." She said staring into my eyes. "Go ahead, Maya."

My whole body exploded. I cried out her name as she held me tightly, while my body shook as wave after wave of pleasure just crashed into my body. She kept kissing my lips, never quieting me down, although I was afraid her mother might have heard me.

It took me a little while to calm down, but when I did...boy. I might have liked her massages, but this...this was something else. My whole body felt intensified yet so damn relaxed. I couldn't even remember ever feeling like this with Andre.

As soon as I thought of his name, reality seriously threw water right on me. I sat up, still trying to calm my body down.

"What's wrong?" Coco asked.

"What just happened?" I asked. Did this mean I was gay? I was pregnant. I couldn't have a major lifestyle change at this time of my life. How would it affect my child? What would my parents think? Why was I just now thinking about all this?

Coco sat up, and put her arm around my shoulders. "Something great just happened, that's what."

I finally looked at her, into those beautiful eyes. "Does this mean I'm gay?"

She just stared at me in silence for a moment then started to laugh. "Why don't we just take things a little slow before you start changing your entire life, ok?"

"But why?" I asked. "You're gay, right?"

"Yes, that I am." She replied.

"Why me?" I asked.

Ever see a black woman blush before? You'd think that it wouldn't really be possible, but I saw her face deepen in colour as she chuckled to herself. "Wow, ok. I don't really know how to say it, really. I like you. I've liked you for a minute."

"How long?"

"Since last year. I mean, I knew you were with that guy and all, but I couldn't help myself, I just liked you. Everything about you. You and me traveled differently, but I thought you were still cool, know what I mean?"

I nodded, understanding. I felt the same way.

"Is that why you've been so nice to me lately?" I asked.

She just smirked. "I ain't stupid. I saw an opportunity to get to know you better and do the things I've always wanted to do with you. So when Andre fucked up, I took my chance."

I looked down at my belly. "You weren't put off by my being pregnant?"

She shrugged. "I didn't really think of it as anything bad. I won't lie; it threw me for a little bit. But it doesn't change how I feel about you. I really do like you, Maya."

I just sighed. "Listen, Coco. I like you too, just not really sure how I feel. But what I do know is that now is not the time for me to be making any new relationships or anything like that. I don't have just me to consider anymore."

"You don't think I know that?" She asked. "Girl, I've already thought about all that. I'm offering my friendship and support. I'm letting you know right now that I want more. But I ain't putting any pressure on you. But I'm gonna be here, you can bank on that."

I couldn't help but feel a little anger that it wasn't Andre saying these words that I so needed to hear. But it wasn't Andre. It was Coco. And as I looked into her eyes, I realized that I did like hearing the words come from her.

I didn't say anything. I just leaned against her, and she lay us down, pulling me close so I lay my head on her chest. And we fell asleep.

*** ***

I can't even explain how things were after that night. Things just seemed to fall into place, and without even really discussing anything, Coco and I just kind of moved closer to each other. We became inseparable. Even though we both had jobs outside of school, we somehow managed to see each other every day. I swear she was like an expecting parent herself, buying baby things whenever something caught her eye. The embarrassment I felt at first slowly started to fade when I realized that she really enjoyed doing these things. She was totally spoiling me, never letting me really go anywhere by myself; picking me up from work, taking me to doctor appointments-even attending the last few. And, I admit, it was nice to have someone look forward to my baby as much as I was. And I was. There would be nights that I would just hold my tummy and just talk to my little boy or girl, and tell them about all the things that were going on, and what hopes I had for him or her...and the possibility of Coco being there with us as well.

By the time I hit my seventh month, we had settled into a little routine. In the past few months, my life had dramatically changed. I hardly saw my friends anymore, and when I did, all they had were questions about Andre and who the hell was the chick I was hanging out with. Those questions were hard to answer. I still wasn't really sure of what was going on with me personally. Ok, that was a lie. I knew. I cared for Coco deeply. In such a short time, she became so important to me, and I wasn't sure what was going to happen, but I knew I wanted her in my life. But I wasn't ready to broadcast that to the world just yet. I just said that she was a friend and left it at that.

And Coco stayed true to her word, not putting any kind of pressure on me whatsoever. We were basically playing everything by ear, taking things natural. It was hard trying to think of how to explain our friendship to my parents. Things that I wasn't normally doing before I was doing now; like spending nights out. I didn't get any real arguments, since my father was still hardly speaking to me, and it was easier on my mother to not really have me there. So I spent a lot of my free time at Coco's place. Her mother, of course, was happy to have me there. Coco had already come out to her mother, who was very supportive, years ago, and Maria already knew that Coco liked me. So, in a way, what parental support I couldn't get from my own parents, I got from Maria. It was she who had to remind us about my OB/GYN appointments, about attending Lamaze classes, and of course, that I wasn't eating enough, even though I felt like I must have gained about fifty pounds.

By my ninth month, Coco and I didn't need words to explain what was going on between us. I think people just made their own assumptions and either accepted it or not. My father and mother eventually did come around, and when we told them about us, surprisingly they accepted it. All my mother wanted was to hear was that I was in love and with someone that loved me unconditionally. And I was, and Coco did, and that's all that mattered. Andre did try to put his foot down a few weeks before I went into labor, but Coco and my parents put him in his place.

And two days after graduation, I gave birth to our daughter Samara. Andre's name is on the birth certificate, but everyone knows whose daughter she really is. Coco and I have our baby girl, and I found love in the most unexpected situation. It gives me hope that no matter how bad things can get, something good will always come out of it.

THE END

Copyright © 2001. Used by permission of author. All Rights Reserved.