by
Gyrlcandy

_____ Lovelle looked at her girlfriend Jay and didn't understand why she was breaking up with her, she had always been good to Jay, always treated her right and now she was just ending things. In addition, Jay had obviously had enough to drink and she told her so. "Girl, don't you tell me when I've had enough," Jay said.
_____"Look, you're drunk, let me take you home," Lovelle said taking Jay's hand.
_____"Get your hands off of me, stop always trying to be my mother."
_____"I'm just trying to look out for you."
_____"I'm not your responsibility we just broke up remember?"
_____"Your drunk, I know you didn't mean that."
_____"Oh yes I did, were through."
_____"Why?" she asked, her face a mask of pain.
_____"Because I'm tired of you, I need something new."
_____"What?!?" Lovelle said in shock.
_____"Girl, don't act surprised, you knew I was a playa when we met."
_____"Look, you can't mean this, lets go home and talk about this."
_____"Don't tell me what I mean, I'm through with you."
_____"So what are you going to do now, get another girl?"
_____"You know it, there's plenty of fine ass girls around here."
_____"Why are you doing this?"
_____"Don't stand there and act all innocent, I know about you, I know what you used to do before you moved here."
_____"What are you talking about?"
_____"Oh, now you got amnesia, well let me refresh your memory, does the name Big John mean anything to you?" She could tell by the horrified look on Lovelle's face she could see it did. "Oh I see it does."
_____"But...but how?"
_____"How did I know? Well I ran into him last night and he told me all about the work' you used to do."
_____Lovelle just stood there completely stunned; she knew the past would catch up to her. "What did he tell you?"
_____'Oh just how you used to work for him, and you were one of his best girls."
_____Lovelle felt sick, all she wanted to do was get away from her past; she worked hard to rebuild her life. "Look that was a long time ago, I've moved on and made a new life, please don't hold something I did 5 years ago against me, I want us to be together."
_____"You know, I wanted to be with you too, but when I found that out all that changed."
_____"Would you had been with me if I would have told you from the beginning?"
_____"Hell no!"
_____"Well that's why I didn't tell you. That was a long time ago, I'm a different person now, I want us to make a life together."
_____"Fuck that I aint spending my life with no prostitute."
_____That hurt Lovelle deeply, why couldn't Jay see that she was a completely different person? "I am not a prostitute," Lovelle said angrily.
_____"Not anymore, look the point is it's over and I am going to go and find me a woman with some morals."
_____"Can't we just talk about this?"
_____"What's there to talk about? It's over."
_____"Why does it have to be over?"
_____"Why? Because, everyone knows you cant turn a hoe into a housewife." And with that she turned
_____and walked away.
_____Lovelle just stood there trying to keep the tears at bay; she couldn't believe Jay did her like that. She took a seat at one of the nearby tables and thought about what just happened. Once again her dream of finding a butch that wouldn't care about her past was shot to hell. You cant outrun the past, no matter how hard you try. Its not that she tries to keep it a secret, but she couldn't stand to see the shocked and disgusted looks on their faces when they find out. All she wanted was a nice butch that would love her, treat her tight and wouldn't run when things got tough. And in return she would give all the love she had to give. Finding butches wasn't the problem, she was blessed with a pretty face but she didn't think she was all that. Keeping them was the problem. They lied, cheated, used her as a trophy, hit it and run or they found out about her past and they were gone. She was not having much luck. She called her friend Janice. Janice was her best friend but she couldn't help but be jealous of her, Janice has a girlfriend that is faithful and adores her.
_____"Hey girl."
_____"What's wrong," Janice said, immediately hearing the sadness in her friends tone.
_____"Jay broke up with me."
_____"What, why?"
_____"She found out."
_____"How?" Janice said immediately knowing what she was talking about.
_____"Somehow she ran into big John and he told her."
_____"Damn, I'm sorry hon."
_____"It's ok, that's what I get for thinking I could find a girl that doesn't care about my past."
_____"Trust me there's a girl out there that doesn't give a damn about that."
_____"Well then why can't I find her?"
_____"Maybe you're overlooking her."
_____"What do you mean?"
_____"Well look at the girls you date."
_____"What about them?"
_____"The only girls you talk to are them super fly pretty butches that think they are gods gift to women, they playas Lovelle, you get with the superfine butches that all the girls be trying to take away from you. Take Carina, girls would slip her their number, call all night, do some crazy shit because she was so fine. You were a trophy for her and for the other girls too."
_____"So what do you think I should do?"
_____"Maybe you should get with a different type of woman, instead of getting with they playa type, maybe you should try a more soft spoken woman a not quite so fly girl, a woman that will appreciate you."
_____"You think so."
_____"Hell yeah, look at Kim. I was being superficial and not messing with her because she didn't look like those butches you see in the club, but when I did give her a chance she was the best thing that ever happened to me. She makes me feel special; she never makes me feel anyone is more important than I am. Yeah she doesn't look like those fly ass butches in the club, but she gives me what none of those girls can."
_____"What's that?"
_____"Her heart, her fidelity, her love, and when you find the right one...she's gonna give you the same thing." Lovelle heard the door close in the back round and knew Kim had just come in. "Hey baby" Janice said kissing Kim and groaned when Kim slipped her tongue in her mouth and squeezed her ass.
_____"I missed you so much baby," Kim said.
_____"Oh! Lovelle is on the phone," Janice said almost forgetting.
_____"Hey, Lovelle," Kim said loud enough to be heard.
_____"Hi Kim, how you doin?"
_____"A lot better, now that I'm with my baby," she said kissing Janice on the neck.
_____"I hate you Janice," Lovelle said enviously.
_____"Hey, I told you what to do," Janice said putting Lovelle on speakerphone so she could give Kim all the attention she was demanding, she was such a big baby.
_____"Kim, honey, we gotta help Lovelle."
_____"Help her with what?" Kim said concentrating on Janice's neck.
_____"Jay dumped her."
_____"Damn, I'm sorry to hear that, she was no good anyway," Kim said.
_____"Kim, honey, don't you have any friends you could hook her up with," Janice asked.
_____Kim knew she better say yes or she wouldn't be getting none. "I do, but they're not her type"
_____"And what does that mean?" Lovelle said.
_____"Well, there not the super fly pimp wanna be girls you mess with."
_____"Oh we already talked about that, Lovelle is going to broaden her horizons and try dating other people besides the playas," Janice said.
_____"Yeah, I'm gonna try dating nice women, not just dogs."
_____"Ok, well I have a friend at work and I think you would like her, her name is Lisa and she is really nice, I'm sure she'd like to go out with you sometime."
_____"You think we would get along?"
_____"Yeah, she likes the movies like you, she's a cat lover too ya'll have a lot in common, I'll talk to her tomorrow and see if she's free this weekend."
_____"Ok, thank you Kim, I appreciate this."
_____"No problem."
_____After they hung up Lovelle found herself looking forward to going out with somebody different. Normally she wouldn't want to go out after just getting out of a relationship but she decided Jay wasn't worth mourning over, she's moving on. The next night, she was lying on the couch with her cat when the phone rang. "Hello?"
_____"Hello, is this Lovelle" A pleasant voice said.
_____"Yes, who's calling?"
_____"This is Lisa, Kim's friend."
_____"Oh hi!"
_____"Kim gave me your number and told me to call you..."
_____They talked for hours, it turned out that they had a lot in common.
_____"Kim told me you were very pretty."
_____"Well Kim exaggerates, I'm ok but not all that."
_____"I'm ok too, not a super fly stud..."
_____"Trust me, that's not even important, it's not the looks that count."
_____They talked every night up until Friday. They made plans to go out to a nice restaurant. Lovelle couldn't believe she got along so well with Lisa, she just hoped that when they met it was the same chemistry.
_____They agreed to meet at the restaurant, Lisa got there first and was nervously waiting for Lovelle to show, she was looking at the wine list when she heard Lovelle's voice. "Lisa?" Lisa looked up and couldn't help it when her mouth dropped open. She was gorgeous! "Yeah it's me."
_____"It's nice to finally meet you," Lovelle said reaching for her chair to pull it out but Lisa beat her to it and pulled her chair out for her. "Thank you," Lovelle said smiling.
_____"Your welcome."
_____"I have to admit, I was a little nervous," Lovelle confessed.
_____"Why?"
_____"Well, it's our first time meeting but I feel like I already know you."
_____They fell into a relaxed conversation, Lovelle was having a great time with Lisa, and true Lisa is not the type of woman she would normally date but she was sweet and funny and actually paid attention to her. It was obvious Lisa liked her, but she wouldn't take that for granted because women liked her until they found out about her past, then they avoided her like that plague. She was going to take her time; she wasn't going to rush things.
_____Lisa couldn't believe her luck, not only was Lovelle gorgeous, but she was genuinely nice and sweet. She wasn't vain at all; she was an interesting talker and an attentive listener. And she seemed to like her. When the night came to an end she walked Lovelle to her car.
_____"I had a really good time tonight," Lovelle said.
_____"Me too."
_____They talked a little bit more and Lovelle was mentally screaming Ask me out again!
_____Lisa was trying hard to work up the nerve
_____"So um, do you think we could do it again sometime?" Lisa asked.
_____"Sure, I'd love to, why don't you call me and we can set something up," Lovelle said.
_____"Sounds good...I'll call you tomorrow or are you going to be busy," Lisa said.
_____"No, no tomorrow is fine, I'll be waiting."
_____Lisa wanted to kiss her but she wasn't sure if that was too bold.
_____Lovelle was mentally screaming kiss me! However, she could see that Lisa was shy so she decided
_____to take matters in her own hands. "A small incentive to call me tomorrow," Lovelle said and leaned over and kissed Lisa.
_____Lisa immediately responded and stepped closer. Lovelle moaned deep in her throat, Lisa was a great kisser! When they broke apart, they both had smiles on their faces. "That was a nice incentive," Lisa said.
_____"I hope it worked."
_____"Oh it definitely worked, I'll be calling you tomorrow."
_____Lisa called her the next morning, they met up at the park and acted like kids, Lisa pushed Lovelle on a swing, and they acted like big kids. They took Lisa's car into the city and Lovelle saw a bowling alley and begged Lisa to stop, she wanted to go bowling, all her exes never took her because they thought it was corny. They stopped got some shoes and bowled for three games, the third being the tiebreaker. It was close but in the end Lovelle won.
_____"You are good," Lisa said.
_____"It's from playing with my dad, he loves to bowl and I always wanted to go with him."
_____"He taught you well, but next time you wont beat me, I don't think my ego could take another beating."
_____They spent most of their free time together; they spent all their weekends together, before they knew it two months had gone by. Lovelle knew Lisa liked her but it never got physical. Her feelings toward Lisa only grew stronger over the two months and she was pretty sure Lisa felt the same way but neither one of them wanted to be the first to admit it. Lisa was scared; it was just too good to be true. Beautiful women like Lovelle didn't just fall for her, she was scared to commit to Lovelle. She knew that Lovelle liked her but she was scared that some fine ass butch would come along and Lovelle would leave her. It was eating her up.
_____They were over at Lovelle's place spending the evening together and Lovelle couldn't take it anymore. "Lisa do you like me?"
_____"Of course I do."
_____"Then why haven't you asked me out."
_____"Because I thought you were happy with the way things were and I didn't want to rush you...plus I was scared you'd say no."
_____"I see," Lovelle said. "Are you attracted to me, I mean sexually?"
_____"Hell yeah."
_____"Well I can't tell," Lovelle said almost pouting.
_____Lisa went over and sat next to her. "Your really sexy when you pout." She said then leaned over and kissed her. Lovelle ready, didn't even try to suppress the moan in the back of her throat, and pulled Lisa closer. Lisa led Lovelle to the bedroom, laid her down, and slowly got on top of her. Lovelle loved the feel of Lisa on her. Lisa unbuttoned Lovelle's blouse and started kissing her breasts. Lovelle loved the way Lisa' lips felt on her and she could tell she liked the lace Victoria's Secret bra.
_____"You're beautiful," Lisa said.
_____Lovelle moaned and couldn't take it anymore; she took one of Lisa's hands and put it where she needed it the most. Lisa immediately felt the wetness and knew Lovelle was ready. "And Lisa," Lovelle said.
_____"Yes."
_____"I wouldn't say no."
_____Lisa smiled and kissed her way down Lovelle's body and took her to heaven and back. They made love all night. When they were done and they were lying in the bed Lisa noticed the Sade CD Lovelle had on. "I like this song," Lisa said.
_____Lovelle snuggled closer to Lisa and listened to the song, "By your side."
_____"Me too, this is our song." Lovelle said.
_____"Oh, I don't get any say?" Lisa asked smiling.
_____"Of course you do, what do you think?"
_____"How about pop that coochie?" Lisa said.
_____"What!" Lovelle said tickling her.
_____"Ahh!" Lisa screamed laughing.
_____"Or how about put it in your mouth" Lisa said dodging Lovelle trying to wrestle her "You nasty, this is going to be out song, and that's final" Lovelle said pinning Lisa to the bed "That's fine with me" Lisa said, turning Lovelle on her back and taking her breast in her mouth. The subject was quickly forgotten.
_____
_____Being with Lisa made Lovelle happier than she had ever been, she called Kim and thanked her for hooking them up. The only thing that worried her was Lisa finding out about her past. She didn't want to spoil things between them, Lisa was very loving and understanding but she didn't want to ruin things between them. So she called Janice to ask for her advice. "So do you think I should tell her?"
_____"Yea I do."
_____"But look how it's turned out in the past I don't want to loose her."
_____"Look, Lisa is absolutely crazy about you, don't underestimate her she might just surprise you."
_____Lovelle wanted to believe that but her relationships have been ruined because of her past.
_____
_____A friend of Lisa's was having a party and she women were going to be hitting on Lovelle. But she wasn't worried anymore, she knew Lovelle was committed to her, she trusted her. Lovelle was excited about the party; she hadn't met many friends of Lisa's and was looking forward to it. She looked in a sexy and sophisticated sundress. When she came out of the room, Lisa just stopped and stared. "How do I look?" Lovelle said enjoying Lisa's expression.
_____"Stunning," Lisa said sincerely.
_____Lovelle loved her so much her heart could burst. She took Lisa's face in her hands and told her what she had been dying to say. "I love you."
_____Lisa was shocked; she was hoping she wasn't the only one in this relationship crazy in love "Really?"
_____"Oh honey, I love you so much, you never make me feel like I always have be dressed up, you listen to me, you take good care of me when I'm sick, you make me feel like I'm the only woman in the world." Lovelle said sincerely.
_____"That's because you are, you're the only woman in the world to me, I love you too baby." Lisa kissed her with all the love and passion she had inside, they almost didn't make it to the party, instead they were just late.
_____
_____When they got there a whole bunch of Lisa's friends were there and they all wanted to know how she got such a fine ass girl. Lovelle made no secret of who she was with, she was proud to tell them she was Lisa's woman. When the hostess pulled Lisa away and the fly ass butches she would normally want tried to talk to her, but she wasn't hearing it. They couldn't do anything for her. When Lisa got back, they danced together and it was obvious they were in love. Lisa went to the kitchen to get Lovelle a drink and didn't pay attention when someone walked in the kitchen behind her.
_____"Wassap?" Jay said.
_____"Sup," Lisa said not really paying attention to her, not knowing who she was.
_____"So is that your girl?"
_____"Yeah that's my baby." Lisa said.
_____"Your baby huh, well did she get around to telling you about her past?"
_____"Excuse me?"
_____"I guess she didn't."
_____"Who are you?"
_____"I'm her ex girl, Jay. She might have mentioned me."
_____"No, actually she didn't."
_____That burned Jay up. "Well I guess she aint gonna tell you like she wasn't gonna tell me."
_____"Tell me what?"
_____"What she used to do before she moved here?"
_____"Look, I don't know and I really don't care." Lisa said walking past her.
_____ "Oh you don't care that your girl is a hoe?"
_____"What!" Lisa turned around ready to get violent.
_____"Hey, calm down I'm telling you the truth, she used to be a prostitute."
_____"You aint nothing but a lying, jealous bitch."
_____"I'm not lying, ask her."
_____"I aint asking her shit." Lisa said.
_____"Honey what's taking so..." Lovelle stopped dead when she saw Jay.
_____"Jay, what are you doing here?"
_____"Just trying to enlighten your new girl, since I knew you wouldn't."
_____"She's trying to say you was a prostitute," Lisa said furiously about two seconds off Jay's ass.
_____"Come on Lovelle, why didn't you tell your new girl you was a street walking hoe?"
_____And before anyone knew it, Lisa's right hand connected with Jay's jaw. "Say something else" Lisa said.
_____"Calm down Lisa," Lovelle said.
_____"Fuck that, she standing here talking shit and lying on my girl, she lucky I don't stomp her ass." Lisa said looking like she might change her mind at any moment. "I don't appreciate anyone lying about my woman."
_____Lovelle sighed and knew she would have to tell Lisa the truth. "She's not lying," She said in a small voice.
_____"What?" Lisa said not believing her.
_____"I said she's not lying...I wanted to tell you but I didn't want to ruin everything between us."
_____"All this time and you didn't tell me?"
_____"I...I'm sorry," Lovelle said sadly looking away from Lisa not being able to look at the hurt and anger on her face. "I just didn't want to loose you."
_____"Come on, lets go," Lisa said taking Lovelle's hand, making excuses to her friend for leaving early and leaving Jay in the kitchen with a broken jaw. When she pulled up to Lovelle's place her hand was throbbing, she never hit anyone like that before. Once they were inside Lovelle got her a bucket of ice for her hand. "Here put your hand in here, I know it hurts." Lisa obediently put her hand in the bucket and looked at Lovelle. "Ok, explain."
_____Lovelle explained that she didn't have much choice, she had no money, she and her family weren't on good terms and her situation wasn't looking good. It was her last resort. She explained how that was her past and now she was a different person. The whole time she talked Lisa listened with an impassive face. Lovelle knew she had lost her, Lisa wasn't saying anything. Lovelle looked at her and wondered what she was thinking.
_____"Lisa?" Lovelle said timidly .
_____Lisa took her hand out of the ice and told Lovelle to come over and sit next to her. Lovelle went over and sat down. "What do you want out of this relationship?"
_____"What do you mean?"
_____"Do you want us to stay together?"
_____"Lisa baby, all I want is to be with you."
_____"Tell me what you want our future to be like."
_____"I want a old fashioned life, a house, you outside mowing the lawn, me inside cooking, something
_____like that."
_____"You want to be a house wife?" Lisa said surprised.
_____"Yes, I know it's not very politically correct and independent and everything, but I want to stay home and take care of my woman, I guess I'm old fashioned but I like the idea of cooking for you, giving you shoulder rubs, I want to take care of you."
_____Lisa just looked at her and wondered how she got so lucky.
_____"But most of all I want to be a lady for you, and I understand If you think I'm not a lady because of my past but I..."
_____"Shh, honey you are a lady, don't ever think your not, all that shit in your past I don't care about that. All I'm interested in is your present and your future. Your past is just that, your past I love the Lovelle I'm looking at right now."
_____Lisa braced herself; she knew what was coming so she was ready when Lovelle practically threw herself at her smothering with kisses.
_____"I love you too baby, just watch, I'm gonna make you so happy."
_____"You already have."
_____Lovelle looked at Lisa and knew she had found the woman she was going to spend the rest of her life with. She noticed Lisa flinch when she touched her hand. "Oh honey, I'm sorry."
_____"It's ok, it doesn't hurt," Lisa said lying.
_____"Doesn't hurt huh, well come to the medicine cabinet and let me take care of you," Lovelle said making Lisa follow her to the medicine cabinet.
_____"Take care of me huh, I'm not a baby."
_____"Yes you are, you're my baby."
_____Lisa smiled because she knew Lovelle was right, she was a big baby, but then again most butches are.

THE END

Copyright © 2001. Used by permission of author. All Rights Reserved.