__________by L. Monique

People warned me
he might not like, might not accept it
and I prayed he’d understand
I told them I’d be caring and careful

I’m a mother, a sister, a daughter and a lover
a creation of the holy divine
sweet, wonderful and fine

and I’ve spent too much time
trying to fit in.... doing the so called ‘right thing’
all the while my face plastered
with a fake shit eatin’ grin

and then suddenly, just like that
right in front of my eyes, he crept in
and captured the heart of my forbidden love

and her, she seemed not to mind
in fact, she seemed not to be able to resist
his sparkling eyes
the way he smiled and seemed to love to touch her
seemed to make her heart rise

that’s what I gathered, from the contented looks on their faces
during what was such a long embrace.....
they didn’t see me watching

it used to be all about me
and now whenever I talk to her
she asks about him, though nonchalantly
I know she’s trying to make our two a three

and to think, I would never have guessed
he’d love her so
so deep, so true

my heart still melts when I see her
and I always wanted them to be friends
but this new love affair has knocked me off my feet
floored me, dead on my ass, taken me totally by surprise

though nothing could have prepared me for the day
he looked at my lover and told her
he’ll always love me, but he’s glad that
.......she’s his mommy now too

not yet bitten by society’s bugs
for him 2 mommies just means extra hugs

so he loves her, unconditionally
my baby
his name is Nkosi
and he’s only 5

Copyright © 1997. Used by permission of author. All Rights Reserved.