My darling, Good morning,

____Yes, I know I should be asleep. I cannot sleep. I needed to talk with you and for you to listen to me, to my voice, to my anguish. I need you. I want you so very badly until I am aching all over. Every muscle in my body is crying out to feel you. Every hair on my head, my arms, my legs is craving to experience the electricity that ignites and rips along the hairs of your body when you come together with someone whom you truly love.
____When I am speaking with you, my ears are starving to hear those words up close, to feel the breath leave your lips, your body, and caress them as the words flow down into my being. My nose is flaring and straining to inhale the fragrance of your very body, your smell, your sweat, your desire. My mind is searching for, for the mind that so stimulates my thoughts and drives me, even when I am so tired, I cannot speak. My eyes keep crying, wanting to take in, this woman whom I feel so very deeply, who moves my spirit to travel across time and space, who makes my hands ache with desire to simply touch her, to hold her, to caress her.
____I need you, and I don't want you to take this lightly. I am right now, so filled with desire for you that it is all I can do to write this out, to get this out, I wanted to tell you last night, I was so full in my spirit last night, I was crushed, I was crying inside. I was so very disappointed that I could not fix that which felt like it was breaking inside of me. I could not share it. You were in another place, a place detached from me. I could not draw you to me so I could share it, you were away from me. You stayed away from me in the spirit and when I tried to bring you close to me, you stepped away.
____And the aching, the hurting, the throbbing intensified all over my body until all I could do was to breathe away the disappointment I felt in all of my being. And in the middle of my suffering, here came reality, who managed to succeed in demonstrating just how far away from me you are FROM ME who wants and needs you. And, all I could do was breathe. I could only breathe, because for me, breath is God's healing salve, God's life committment into our very being, God's spirit flowing in and through us, resonating and reviving us, God's fusion with us flowing through us and in us, and which we must continue if we are to live. All I could do was breathe. And in my breathing I was able to ease the hurting just enough, to stop wanting just enough, to stop needing and craving almost enough, to breathe and lift my anguish just barely enough that I could sleep . . . and continue to breathe. Rest well my darling,

I love you,

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