by
Raw_Materiyal

things concerning lesbians and genderbending
I really don't understand why it is so necessary to keep
putting labels on people
to keep everyone confined and retained. If only you realized
that your
expression
your desire to see me
in your eyes only
limits me
suffocates me
hits my soft spot
and makes me look at you deeper
longer
like
I don't wanna come to close to you because I see you
really
and really seeing you
reduces me to being a punk
it forces me to look closer and focus and get a nicer view
and at the same time it shows me the monster in me.
the scary person
if I could I would erase all the past hurts
the rejections
the child hood memories that come fresh like dew
that dry up by the end of the day only to return in the
morning
I know exactly how you feel
really I know
but I can't totally relate
that would be dangerous
that would be too much like
being transparent and open and prone to falling in love
and too much like being wide open
and too much like being out there
not just for you but for me too
so I could know what good love feels like
and
and also know what heartbreak and ache is
self infliction
self
hummn
and when I started
when I begin to look at you I saw you deep from the beginning
and when you knew me already that left me feeling new for
days
feeling revived but now
I feel this way
I feel like I have walked knee deep into an ocean and either
I swim or turn back
I see the tide and it will pull me in but nature is kind so
it's kinda like a slow roll
still all of this reduces to bullshit somehow.
The weightier thing is underneath and
I dare to only scratch the surface.

Copyright © 2004. Used by permission of author. All Rights Reserved.



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