Lil AJ

I loved Qua. More than I had ever loved anyone including myself. Maybe that was why it was so easy for her to get under my skin and into my heart as easily as she did. We were together for two years and for the first one it was great. Qua treated me like a Queen. She was the perfect girlfriend and there was nothing more I could ask for. That was why I never thought she would do me the way she did, but as time went on she began to change. She wasn't the same person I had fell in love with, but still and all I was in love with her. She started becoming more and more demanding. Everytime I left the house I had to report to her where I was going, who I was going to be with, and what time I would be home.

One night I came home later than I had anticipated and met a hand across my face. "Where the fukk you been?" Before I could explain, I was being lifted up off the floor by my neck. "Veronica, don't make me fukkin' hurt you. Where the fukk you been?" I couldn't believe what was happening.

As the tears rolled down my face I choked out my explanation. "K-kelly p-picked up her f-friend from w-work but s-she got off l-later than we ex-expected. It w-wasn't my fault. Dre w-works on the I-Island. There was n-no way f-for me t-to get back on m-my own." My tears were coming more profusely as she just stared me dead in my eyes. She dropped me and administered another smack. This one was a backhand that sent me falling to the floor in a balled up, sobbing heap. My head was pounding and I thought I felt my lip bleeding but I didn't dare move.

My ears were ringing but I clearly heard Qua's voice. It was harsh and ice cold. "You fukkin' came home late so you could meet some other nigga? You lucky I'm being as calm about this as I am. Now shut the fukk up and collect youself 'cuz I don't want no fukkin blood, snot, or tears in my food."

She walked away. So I was bleeding. Fear now instilled in my heart, I got up and I did as I was told. After I served Qua her food she had another request. "Yo c'mere. I'm mad horny and I want some pussy." I really wasn't in the mood. My pride, spirit, and heart had just been broken right along with my lip.

"Qua please not tonight. I'm really not up to it." I protested. She grabbed me and tossed me on the bed. "I don't remember asking you what you were up to. Maybe if you weren't out fukkin' that other nigga you would be up to it. Now I said I want some pussy and you my woman so you gonna give me some pussy."

She held me down with one arm and the other one ripped off my clothes. I was much smaller than Qua so there was nothing else I could do except lay there. I couldn't take another hit that night and if this was going to get her to leave me alone than so be it. I tried to resist initially without being obvious, but she forced my legs apart and entered me roughly with her strap. Harder and harder she pumped me and I moaned and groaned and cried. Not because it felt good but because it felt as though she were ripping me in two.

When she was finally satisfied she let me go clean up. I put the rag between my legs and if my period hadn't just left days before I would have sworn it had just came. I was having trouble walking but I had to hide it. Twelve midnight. Officially the next day. Happy birthday to me.

The beatings and sexual assaults came more and more frequent as time went on. One day I threatened to leave. Qua came home from work early. She had called my job and the secretary told her I had left for the day. She seen me in the room packing my things. "What the fukk are you doing and where do you think you're going?"

I tried to be strong. "Qua I'm leaving. I'm going to stay with Kelly. I can't take this abuse anymore." She glared at me and walked forward. I stood my ground. She cocked her fist and threw a punch at my face. On instinct and reflex I blocked.

"Oh you a bold bitch now. You raising your hand to me?" she spat.

In that instant all of the courage I had mustered up drained from me like water through a sieve.

"No Qua..." I began, but I was cut off by a punch to my head. She grabbed me by my hair and flung me across the floor.

"So you trying to leave me?" she screamed. Another punch. This time it was to my face. I felt like I was going to blackout. Qua came and stood over me. "I guess you stuck here now bitch since you too fukked up to go anywhere. Now shut the fukk up and call that bitch Kelly and tell her you changed your mind." She started to walk away. Before she left the room she uttered the words that still haunt me. "The next time you try to leave me I will kill you."

After Qua left the room I tried to compose myself. Half-seeing and bleeding from my lip and nose, I called Kelly. I told her as much as I possibly could without going into detail just in case Qua was listening. Kelly said not to worry because she was coming to get me and I was leaving that night.

I stayed out of Qua's way as much as possible for the remainder of the day. At about seven o'clock there was a knock on my door. "Who the fukk is that?" Qua demanded.

"I-I don't know." I answered as I got up to get the door. Qua pushed me back down.

"Sit your ass right there. I'll get it." She opened the door. It was Kelly.

"Where's Veronica?" she asked.

Qua lied. "She ain't here." Kelly pushed the door. "Bullshit. Tell her to get her shit 'cuz she's leaving."

Qua laughed. "You a funny bitch. Veronica ain't going no fukkin' where."

I came out of the room battered, bruised, and tired. Kelly gasped when she seen me. I knew I looked bad. I looked at Qua through the eye that wasn't swollen shut. "Yes I am Qua. I'm leaving. Tonight was it."

Qua gave me the look of death. "Didn't I tell you if you tried to leave again what I would do? Didn't I tell you I would kill you? Did you think I was playing? Now you take me for a fukkin' joke?" Qua drew her gun from her waist. Two shots rang out. Qua fell. I looked up to see Dre still aiming at Qua's dead body.

So you see your Honor, if Dre hadn't shot Qua I'd be dead right now and quite possibly so would Kelly.

"I see Ms. Davis. You may step down." After closing arguements, the judge turned the case over to the jury. Dre's freedom was literally in the hands of 12 strangers. Ninety minutes later, members of the jury finally filed back into the courtroom one by one.

"Has the jury reached a decision?"

"Yes we have your Honor."

"What say you?"

"In the case of the State vs. Andrea Michaels, we the jury find the defendant...NOT GUILTY!"

Kelly, Dre, and I jumped up and down hugging and crying. Through her tears, Dre turned to the judge and the jury. "Thank you."

It was my victory, too. I finally felt free.


Copyright © 2001. All Rights Reserved.

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